The Last Offering

I was Mom's tool to coax Hailey to eat. Whenever Hailey refused to eat, Mom would give me a meatball she cooked. When Hailey finally wanted to eat, that meatball would then be snatched from me and fed to Hailey. Mom always said, "Hailey isn't of good health. You're her elder sister, so you must be sensible." When I was eight years old, there was a last meatball on the table. Mom put the meatball by my lips with a smile. As if suddenly possessed, I gobbled the meatball up in one mouthful. Mom slapped me hard and dragged me off the chair. "You glutton! That was for your sister!" The back of my head hit the corner of the table, and the world turned dark. When I opened my eyes again, I saw Mom hugging Hailey as she said tenderly, "Don't cry. Helen was naughty, and I'll punish her." She completely ignored me on the floor as she carried Hailey out. "Kneel here and reflect on your mistake. You're only allowed to get up when you admit your mistake." The door slammed shut. I crawled up from the floor, wanting to tell her that I was wrong. But when I looked down, I saw myself still kneeling on the ground. Mom, I won't snatch Hailey's meatballs from her ever again… Chapter 1 The flavor of the meatball was so strong that it started to taste bitter. I knelt on the chair, my hands gripping the edge of the table as my stomach growled in hunger. My younger sister, Hailey Smith, pushed away the bowl before her with a frown. "I don't want it! Meatballs are disgusting!" The bowl tipped over, and the meatball rolled out. Mom didn't get mad. Instead, she patiently picked up the meatball and put it back into the bowl. "These are fresh meatballs that Grandma sent over. They're delicious." "I don't want any!" Hailey started stomping her foot. Mom sighed as her gaze shifted to me. "Helen." She spooned up the last meatball, the juices dripping off the spoon and landing in Hailey's bowl. "This meatball smells so good. Helen, do you want some?" I nodded profusely as saliva filled my mouth. I hadn't eaten anything proper over the past two days. Leftover pasta was poured into the trashcan yesterday, because Mom said eating leftovers was bad for health. But I could eat them. I wasn't scared of that. "Want some?" Mom put the meatball, which was still steaming, on my lips, and I could feel the heat on the tip of my nose. "It smells delicious. Why don't you take a bite?" Mom was coaxing me, but her gaze shifted to Hailey. Hailey stopped stomping her foot as she started staring at the meatball. It was hers. I knew it was hers. I was very familiar with the process. I should be opening my mouth and pretending to take a bite, and Mom would then move the food away and stuff it into Hailey's mouth. Hailey would then chew on the food smugly as she made a face at me, and I would watch her finish her food as I swallowed hard. It should have been the same this time. I opened my mouth, feeling the meatball on my lips. It was so fragrant. So, so fragrant. Before I realized what I was doing, I had chomped down on the meatball. I swallowed the entire meatball without even chewing, simply sending it straight down my throat. The steaming meatball slid down my throat, the heat scalding my chest, but I didn't find it painful. I simply felt the relief in my stomach after it had been empty for two days. Hailey was stunned, and so was Mom. At the next second, her cries pierced through the air. "Wahh!" Hailey swept her bowl onto the floor, and it smashed into pieces. "She ate my meatball! That was mine!" Mom's face twisted in anger. Smack! There was a searing pain on my cheek, and my ears buzzed. The taste of meat still left in my mouth was now tinged with the taste of blood. "Are you that hungry?!" She pointed at my nose and yelled. "That was meant to make your sister eat. Who told you to actually eat it?! "Spit it out right now!" She reached out to dig into my mouth, her fingernails scratching my gums. However, I couldn't spit it out, as the meatball was already in my stomach. Hailey's cries grew louder as she started rolling on the floor, throwing a tantrum. "I want to die! Helen stole my food! I want fried chicken!" Mom's heart broke. She pulled her finger out of my mouth and turned to hug Hailey. When she turned around and saw me seated on the chair in a daze, she shoved me hard out of anger that was still boiling in her. "Go away! I get frustrated just looking at you!" I was so light that I flew from my chair from the force. "Bang!" The back of my head hit the corner of the solid wood table with a dull thud, and the world started turning dark before me—the rage on Mom's face, Hailey's wide-open mouth, and the shards of the broken bowl on the floor. I slid down weakly, my knees on the floor as my upper body slumped over with my head bowed low. I looked as though I was kneeling for forgiveness. Right before I lost consciousness, I was thinking, "That meatball tasted delicious." Chapter 2 "Don't play dead." Mom's voice came from afar. "Who are you trying to kid, playing dead each time you do something wrong?" I opened my eyes and found myself standing by the dining table. Strange. Didn't I just fall down? I looked down and saw someone on the ground. She was wearing an ill-fitting school uniform that had faded from many washings. She was kneeling on the floor, her head plastered on the floorboard. Was that… me? I reached out to touch the person on the ground, but my hand went through the body. Was I dead? Even as the thought crossed my mind, I realized I didn't feel very scared. In fact, I felt a sense of relief. I no longer had to bear with hunger or walk on eggshells, living under someone's thumb. Mom was coaxing Hailey. "Darling, you won't look pretty if your eyes become swollen from crying." "Helen is naughty. I'll punish her." "Daddy will be back real soon. I'll ask him to take us out for some fried chicken." Hailey sobbed as she pointed at me, still kneeling on the ground. "Why isn't she moving?" Mom chuckled coldly. "She's ashamed, of course. She was shameless for stealing your food." "Let her kneel on the ground. She can get up whenever she realizes her mistake!" The door opened, and Dad walked in with his briefcase. "What's happening? I could hear all the crying from the stairwell." Hailey jumped into Dad's embrace. "Helen stole my meatball!" "Mommy hit her, and she's on the floor, refusing to get up!" Dad furrowed his brows and glanced at me on the floor with a look of frustration in his eyes. "Is there a need to kick up such a huge fuss over something so trivial?" He walked over and kicked my calf with the tip of his toe. "Get up! Stop embarrassing yourself!" My corpse remained unmoving. My leg shook from his kick but fell back to its original position. Dad ran out of patience. "Trying to be stubborn now, aren't you?" Mom crossed her arms before her chest and chuckled coldly. "She's just spoiled. Stealing her sister's meatball is just the start. She'll soon end up stepping all over us." "Let her kneel on the floor. She can get up when she realizes her mistake." Dad tugged at his necktie. "Alright. Continue kneeling, and you can forget about eating dinner tonight." Hailey's tears stopped at once. "Daddy, I want fried chicken!" "I want a whole bucket of it! I want ice cream, too!" "Sure, whatever you want." The three of them put on their shoes and headed out. Bam! The gate shut tight, and the house became quiet once more, save for the ticking of the clock on the wall. Tick, tock. Tick, tock. I floated in mid-air, looking at myself. I was in a very awkward position, and my neck was bent at an extreme angle. There was a faint blood stain in the hair at the back of my head. It was very faint and blocked by my hair, making it impossible to see the blood flowing into the collar. No wonder they didn't see the wound. The sky gradually turned dark, and no lights were switched on in the house. The bowl that Hailey tipped over was still on the dining table. A few drops of the meatball sauce were left on the table, almost drying up. I crawled over and tried to sniff hard, but I couldn't smell anything. As it turned out, a dead person didn't even have the right to smell something fragrant. My stomach had stopped growling, but I still felt hungry. I wanted some fried chicken, too. I had never tasted fried chicken before. Each time they went out to eat fried chicken, they would lock me up at home, leaving me two slices of white bread. Whenever Hailey came back, there would be ketchup clinging onto the corner of her mouth. She would deliberately draw close to me and breathe on my face. "Helen, the fried chicken was so good. A pity you couldn't try it." At eleven o'clock, I could hear the door unlocked. They were back. Hailey was holding onto a red balloon with one hand and a half-finished cupcake in the other. "Mommy, I'm tired." "Take a shower before going to bed. You're all oily and greasy." Mom changed out of her shoes and switched on the lights in the living room. The sudden flood of lights was piercing to my eyes, and I instinctively covered them with my arms. I was still in the same position they left me on the ground. Mom glanced at me, stunned. "Still kneeling?" She chuckled. "I really wonder where she got her stubbornness from." Dad yawned and as he walked past the dining room to the washroom, his pant leg brushing against my shoulder. I swayed a little but soon regained my balance. Dad stopped in his tracks and turned back to look at me. "Helen, that's quite enough." "You still have school tomorrow. Quickly wash up and go to bed." When I didn't respond to him, Dad started getting mad. "Do you not hear what I just said? Have you gone mute?" Chapter 3 Dad bent over and grabbed me by the back of my collar. "Get up!" He pulled me up hard. He was surprised by how light I was. Raising his arm up high, he almost managed to lift me completely off the ground. However, I didn't brace myself with my hands on the ground like any living person would. I didn't struggle because of the pain, either. My stiff upper body was lifted up by him while my knees remained bent, my head bowed and hanging heavily by its side. I looked like a ragdoll strung up with a piece of string. I floated to him and waved my hands profusely. "Daddy, I'm dead." "Look closer." "Please, I'm begging you. Touch my nose." He couldn't hear me. Dad furrowed his brows before shaking my shoulders once more. "Helen?" I bowed my head, not responding to his call at all. The table shook, and an empty bowl slid halfway across the table surface. The anger on Dad's face slowly gave way to doubt and confusion. "Did she fall and hit herself somewhere?" The sound of flowing water in the washroom stopped, and Mom's voice sounded from behind the door. "Where could she have hit herself? I only pushed her gently." "Then why is she unresponsive?" "She's putting on an act!" Mom said firmly. "She was just putting on a "poor me" act when she saw you back home and was waiting for you to stand up for her." Dad didn't release his hold as he looked down at the dining table. Half of Hailey's leftover cupcake was still in the box, with some saliva on the edges. Dad picked up the cupcake and waved it in front of me. "Helen, wake up." "Clean up the mess on the floor, and I'll give you this half of the cupcake." The cupcake was so close to my lips. The icing on the cupcake had gone cold, and there was a small piece missing from the edge. When I was alive, I seldom got to eat even Hailey's leftovers. I instinctively opened my mouth, but I could no longer smell its fragrance. My body that was on the floor didn't lift up its head. Dad waited for a few seconds, and Hailey suddenly rushed out of the washroom. Her hair was still wet, and she was all wrapped up in a towel, but that didn't stop her from snatching the cupcake away. "That's mine! I won't give it to Helen even if I can't finish it!" She held the cupcake protectively in her hands and glared at me, still kneeling on the floor. "She already stole my meatball. Why would I let her have my cupcake?" Dad said irritably, "There's just half of it left. Didn't you say you didn't want it anymore?" "I want it now!" Hailey opened her mouth and gobbled up the cupcake in three bites. She ate so quickly that some cupcake crumbs fell out of her mouth. Some of it landed on my shoulder. Mom walked out of the washroom, wiping her hands dry while pulling Hailey into her arms. "Alright, now. No one is snatching your food." "I'll buy you another box tomorrow." Dad was still staring at me. "Something is really wrong with her." With that, he reached out to part the hair on the back of my head. The hair was stuck together by the blood. A little bit more, and he would be able to see the wound hidden underneath. I held my breath, although dead people didn't need to breathe at all. [Dad, just take a look.] [Just take a closer look.] His finger touched my hair. "Don't touch her!" Mom suddenly yelled, and Dad's hand froze in midair. "If you help her up, she'll know that playing dead works," Mom said as she looked coldly at me. "If we were to allow her to play dead over a meatball, will she try to threaten to jump off a building next?" "If it really hurt, she would be crying." "She's not crying or kicking up a fuss because she's waiting for us to beg her." Dad hesitated. Hailey wrapped her arms around his arm and cried indignantly. "Daddy, why are you all just looking at Helen?" The doubt on Dad's face dissipated upon hearing Hailey's cries, and he let go of my collar. My corpse swayed to one side. The back of my head peeked out from the corner of the table, but as I was blocked by the back of a chair, I slowly returned to my original kneeling position. Dad stood up and waved his hand irritably. "Fine, just let her be." "Kneel for as long as you want." He turned his attention to Hailey and started coaxing her. No one turned back to look at me. If he had parted my hair just a little bit more… If Mom hadn't said so much… If they were willing to give me one more second of attention, away from coaxing Hailey… Then they would then realize that I was already dead. But in this family, each time there was a choice to be made, I would never be their choice. I heard sounds of them washing up and chit-chatting. Hailey was playing with water in the washroom, Mom was washing Hailey's back while Dad was watching television in his bedroom. What a heartwarming scene, aside from that corpse kneeling on the ground at the corner of the dining table. Chapter 4 In the deep of the night, the lights in the house started getting switched off, and the door to the master bedroom was shut. I floated to the gap in the door and looked in. Hailey was sleeping in between Dad and Mom, snugly wrapped up in the comforter in the air-conditioned room. She was still grabbing onto that red balloon. I floated back to the dining room and sat on my back. It was so cold. The body on the floor had turned completely icy, and the joints were starting to turn stiff. I sat there, accompanying myself. At three in the morning, Mom stepped out for some water. She was in her nightgown as she groggily made her way to the dining room to pour herself some water. Under the moonlight, my kneeling silhouette resembled a monster. Mom paused midway while drinking her water. She stared at me for a while, doubt flashing across her eyes. She put her glass down and took a step forward. "Helen?" She called out my name softly and tentatively. I floated in front of her and yelled in her face, "Mom, I'm dead. Take a look at me!" Mom couldn't hear me. She tightened her grip over her nightgown and shivered. "Crazy," she berated me. "Who are you trying to scare in the middle of the night?" She turned back to her room and shut the door tight. All my hopes were dashed at that moment. At six in the morning, Mom was the first to wake up. She put on her apron and walked into the kitchen, humming a song. When she walked past the dining room, she completely ignored me, still kneeling on the ground. The aroma of fried eggs and the sweet fragrance of warm milk drifted from the kitchen. Hailey was awake as well, and she walked out of the bedroom in a rabbit nightgown, rubbing her eyes sleepily. "Mommy, I want some sweet milk." "Sure, I'll get you some." Hailey walked past the dining room and spotted me. She ran over and wrapped her arms around my neck from behind. "Helen, wake up." "I want to ride horsie. Wake up and be my horsie!" She shook my body hard. In the past, I would compliantly go on all fours and let her climb on my back. Even though my knees would hurt as they hit the ground, I had to neigh gleefully like a horse. Mom said that was what an elder sister should do. But today, I didn't move. Hailey was starting to get upset. She released her hold over me and shoved me hard. "Are you getting up or not? Get up right now, or I'll have Mommy spank you!" Her hard shove finally tipped the balance. My stiffened body fell to one side, still in that same kneeling position. Bam! The sound my body made when it fell was so loud that it was louder than when I hit the corner of the table. I collapsed on the ground, my arms and legs still twisted in that kneeling posture. My face, which was pale and turning green, was finally exposed to them. My eyes were half closed, and my pupils were dilated as I stared at the ceiling. There was even dried-up sauce at the corner of my lips. That was the final trace of that meatball I had eaten. Hailey was scared out of her wits, but she tried to pull my hand. "Ahh!" She retracted her hand and shrieked. "Mommy! Mommy!" "Helen has become an ice block! She feels so cold!" Mom's hand shook as she was frying the eggs, and the spatula fell onto the floor. She rushed out. "What's the matter? Why are you yelling so early in the morning?" She then saw me lying on the ground in that strange posture. "Helen?" she cried out in a trembling voice. "Stop playing dead. The floor's cold. "Quick, get up. I'll fry some eggs for you." This was the first time she offered to fry me an egg. It was a pity it came too late. Mom walked over, crouched down, and reached out to push my shoulder. My skin felt cold to the touch.