When She Found Me Digging Through the Trash

The day my mother pulled up to school in a Cullinan, I was digging through a trash can for stale bread. She was furious. She snatched the bread right out of my hand and crushed it under her heel. "I give you a living allowance and you're out here going through the garbage? Are you trying to make your own mother look like a joke?" I was about to explain when Ms. Laura grabbed my arm and whispered in my ear. "Don't talk back. Your mom's been a CEO her whole life. She can't handle being challenged in public, especially not by her own daughter." Ms. Laura was my mother's best friend. My living allowance went from my mom to her, then to me. Two hundred a month. When I stayed quiet, Ms. Laura went over to my mom's side. "Elsa's just trying to experience what a tough life feels like. That's the mindset of someone with real grit. Don't crush her spirit." The suspicion in my mother's eyes didn't fade, but the edge softened a little. "This dedicated to roughing it? Fine. But she can't keep this up. People are gonna think my company went under." "Go swipe your meal card and bring me a school lunch. I want to see what they're feeding you here." I lowered my head. Quietly. "I don't have any money." My mother exploded. "No money?! I transfer twenty thousand to Laura every month for your living expenses! I send you the most advanced suppressants and nutrition supplements straight from the company lab! It's only been five days into this month and you're telling me you're broke? Where is all that money going?!" The entire courtyard went dead silent. Chapter 1 This was the first time I'd eaten out of a trash can. Staring at a pile of meat scraps, wilted salad, and mixed-up fried mushrooms, I picked the only thing that was still somewhat clean. A piece of black bread. The second the wheat smell hit my nose, the cramping in my stomach eased. I shoved the bread into my mouth as fast as I could. Everyone in the courtyard was watching. Not a single person looked surprised. Because my poverty was no longer a secret at this school. Eating out of the trash was just a matter of time. On the first day of freshman year, my mom told me I'd completed my awakening and was a mature Alpha now. Time to handle things on my own. She bought my plane ticket. Right before boarding, she sent me one last message. "Your teacher Ms. Laura is my close friend. I'll send your living allowance to her from now on. If you need anything, go to her." When I saw that message, I wasn't thrilled. I was an adult now, after all. But to put my mother's mind at ease, I went to find Ms. Laura the second I arrived. "Here's two hundred. You're a grown Alpha now. Time to learn how to budget." Ms. Laura pressed down on my shoulder and kept going, right into my stunned, blank face. "As a proper student, you should learn to survive on two hundred. The school's far from the city anyway. There's nothing expensive to spend on out here." I didn't respond right away. I just asked one more time. There was no way my mom didn't know that a single monthly dose of suppressant for an adult Alpha during the full moon costs two hundred on its own. "My mom really set it at this amount?" Ms. Laura straightened up. The warm, leaning-in posture was gone. "You're a grown Alpha. Can't you read between the lines of what your mother expects?" "Time to learn about money. She's not going to baby you like she did before your awakening." "Besides, as the future heir, you need to prove through hard work and sacrifice that you're worthy of carrying that responsibility." I don't remember how I left her office. All I remember was the weather being terrible that day. Because I was soaked in sweat. My mother is the Beta CEO of the Blood Moon Group. She controls the entire city's suppressant supply chain. Her most spoiled pony, Bobo, gets fed three hundred a day in premium grain. She even keeps a backup supply of five-hundred-a-pound top-grade feed, just in case Bobo's appetite dips. And for me? Two hundred. Not a day. A month. That works out to six dollars and sixty cents a day. The school did have subsidized meals, but training was intense. Everyone needed supplements and late-night snacks to keep up, or they'd burn out and fall behind. The cheapest plain bread meal was three bucks. Two meals a day, that's six. Plus one nutrition tube at night, one more dollar. That's already two hundred and ten for the month just on food. Then there were toiletries. Toilet paper, shampoo, body wash. Another two hundred, easy. And textbooks. Even secondhand, at least three hundred. Two hundred a month, no matter how you dress it up, was not survivable. Especially during the start of the semester. I stared at my phone. My finger hovered over the call button, stretching out and pulling back four or five times, before the fear of not making it won out. I dialed my mom. The phone rang a few times before her hurried voice came through. "What is it? I'm in the middle of the quarterly supply-chain summit!" I paused for one second, then got straight to the point. "Mom, it's the start of the semester. There's too much to pay for. The money you gave me isn't enough." I was about to list exactly where the money was going, but she cut me off first. "Laura and I already calculated your expenses. If you're careful with your spending, it's more than enough." "Stop living like a princess. You're at school, not on vacation." "I'm swamped right now. If you need something, talk to Laura." She hung up. Chapter 2 The second I put the phone down, the teaching assistant knocked on my desk. "Elsa, we found a bookstore doing a group discount. Whole class buying together, twenty percent off. About two hundred and forty. What do you think?" I instinctively clenched the two hundred in my pocket. I swallowed several times, face burning red, trying to form words. "Never mind, you look busy. I'll go ask the others." She must have seen how uncomfortable I was, because she offered me the out herself. But the commotion had already drawn attention. I forced my head down into my collar. "Oh, and Alphas need to pay a mandatory accident insurance fee. About fifty. It's required. Full moon nights aren't exactly risk-free." The assistant circled the room and came back to me. I pressed my lips together and quietly handed over a hundred. She took it and walked away. I felt the remaining hundred and fifty in my pocket and wanted so badly to video-call my mom. Show her exactly how many things still needed to be bought. Still needed to be paid for. The extravagance she accused me of? I didn't even have the chance to be extravagant. After class, I didn't dare eat. Instead I bought a large bag of dried pasta. Cooking it myself would save a little. Classmates invited me to the welcome party. Fifty each, split evenly. I just smiled and shook my head. Too embarrassed to say I couldn't afford it. The first eighteen years of my life, I'd never known that being broke was something that left you unable to open your mouth. They glanced at me, said nothing, and left. The entire dorm was quiet that night. Everyone was at the party. Just me, alone. That night, I lay in bed and couldn't sleep for the first time in my life. Because of money. The next morning, I started hunting for part-time work all over campus. But this school was too remote, too specialized. Barely any shops nearby. The only gigs were on the school's internal board. Personal tasks like running training laps for people, or clocking in on equipment they didn't want to use. I became a human check-in machine. Completing other people's training tasks all day. Fifteen bucks a session. Ninety a day, max. After my first shift, I passed out halfway back from hunger. Stomach cramps so bad I blacked out. But I'd collapsed somewhere out of the way. By the time I came to, nobody had even noticed. I sucked down my one nutrition tube and collected the payment from the other end. I never knew eighty bucks could be that hard to earn. Never knew you could work yourself half to death and still only get that much. I rushed to contact the teaching assistant. The group book order was still open. I sent the two hundred and forty right away. Then I went back to my dorm, mixed another pot of plain pasta, and swallowed it down along with every tear I had left for the night. My roommates saw me eating pasta again after doing odd jobs, exchanged a look, tucked their designer bags out of sight, and stopped talking. That particular brand of snobbery. The kind that doesn't want you in the conversation. Before, I would have snapped. But now, I was calm. Simply calm. Surviving took every ounce of energy I had. Anything beyond that wasn't forgiveness. My brain just needed to shut off. After that, my roommates never invited me anywhere again. I was invisible. Up before dawn, back after dark. Classes and odd jobs, every single day. Even with the penny-pinching and the side gigs, the money still wasn't enough. Because there was still the dorm's water and electric bill. Phone charges. Random club activity fees that popped up out of nowhere. I kept my daily food budget around three bucks. Breakfast: a big bowl of pasta. Lunch: skip. Dinner: pasta again. No face wash. No skincare. Shampoo and body wash, just the tiniest squeeze each time. When the bottle ran out, I added water and kept going. And every time the full moon came around, not only did I lose my gig income, I had to spend two hundred on suppressant. Because my body didn't have enough fuel stored, each shift took longer. The pain got worse every time. I could feel my wolf spirit weakening. I'd only just come of age, and I was already destroying my body. But I was too broke to do anything about it. After each full moon, I'd have fresh wounds all over. From slamming into walls during the shift because the pain was too much to bear. Once in a while, I'd see Ms. Laura drive past. She'd spot me, pull over, reach out and pat my head, and say something approving. "Elsa, your mom's training is really paying off." "Keep it up. Be independent. Don't let her down." Then she'd hit the gas and drive off. Back in the dorm, I looked at the dried blood on my forehead. The bruises all over my body. I peeled off a strip of dead skin and stared at myself in the mirror. The person staring back felt like a stranger. It had been two months since the semester started. I'd lost twenty pounds. My mom always used to say I had baby fat. She'd pinch my cheeks and tell me to slim down. Well. She should be happy now. The days just ground on. Three full months of grinding, until December came and winter hit. The cold cut through my bones like a blade. I wanted to buy a parka. The cheapest one was three hundred. Three hundred was enough to keep me alive for six weeks. I couldn't afford it. I just endured. One day the temperature dropped to minus two. I was in the equipment room clocking in, wearing a thin long-sleeve. My hands were so red and stiff my fingers wouldn't bend. The next day, I was sick. Dizzy. Throat on fire. My wolf spirit howling in pain inside my body. My roommate told me to go to the clinic. I'd just paid for my last dose of suppressant this semester. I had thirteen bucks left in my pocket. I couldn't even afford a single bottle of medicine. I lay in bed for a full day and night. My wolf spirit didn't get any better. On the third day, I couldn't take it anymore. I called my mom. I'd barely contacted her all semester. Because Ms. Laura kept telling me my mom was busy. Told me to be mature. Don't call and bother her for no reason. I did what I was told. No matter how hard it got, I handled it alone. But now I had nothing left. My mom sounded surprised to hear from me. "Shouldn't you be in class right now? Why are you calling me out of the blue?" I held back the pain, voice hoarse. "Mom, I'm sick. I can't afford to see a doctor." "Can you... send me a little more money?" Instant fury on the other end. "Didn't I tell you over and over to budget your allowance? Stop throwing money around?" "How could you possibly spend so much that you can't even afford a doctor?" Chapter 3 My eyes burned. The acid in my nose made my voice crack. "I haven't been wasting money. It's really just not enough." Two hundred a month. That's less than what Bobo eats in a single day. How could she possibly think it was enough? The frustration nearly shoved those words right out of my mouth. But my mother's sharp voice came first. "If you haven't been wasting it, how come you can't even afford to see a doctor? Elsa, you're getting more and more spoiled!" "I spend every ounce of energy running this company. And you're still like this? Do you have any idea what kind of responsibility you'll have to carry in the future?" "Zero self-control. I'm so disappointed in you!" She hung up first. Again. I held the phone and couldn't understand. Why? Why do other Alpha kids live without a care in the world while I'm killing myself over a few bucks? Why have I done everything I can, worked myself to the bone, and still end up being called wasteful and ungrateful? What do I have to do to make her satisfied? Half an hour later, the dorm door flew open. Ms. Laura. She walked in frowning, already scolding me. "Elsa, what's wrong with you?" "Didn't I tell you your mom's been busy? Don't bother her unless it's important?" "And you went and called her asking for money?" "Do you have any idea how angry she was when she called me? She was livid!" I drew a deep breath. Barely had the strength to speak. "Ms. Laura, I'm sick. I really couldn't afford the doctor. That's the only reason I called her..." Ms. Laura came over, felt my forehead, and softened her tone slightly. "Elsa, I know it's hard. But what your mom's doing is for your own good." "You're an Alpha. If you can't handle a little pain, how are you going to handle real pressure?" "Try to understand her, okay?" My nose stung. Two lines of tears ran down before I could stop them. I understood her. But who was going to understand me? Two hundred a month was crushing me so hard I could barely find a reason to keep going. Ms. Laura saw I wasn't speaking. She pulled two hundred out of her pocket and held it out. "This is a personal loan from me. Take it and go see a doctor." "But you absolutely cannot tell your mother about this." "She wants to toughen you up. If she finds out you spent all your money and then took charity from me on the side, she'll think all her training was for nothing. She won't just yell at you. I'll catch heat too." I looked at the two hundred in her hand. I didn't know what to feel. I took it, hands shaking. "Thank you, Ms. Laura. I'll pay you back as soon as I can." "Don't be so formal with me." She patted my hand lightly, reminded me that I needed to learn to push through on my own, and left. I took the two hundred and dragged my wrecked body to the school clinic. Dr. Harper finished the exam. Her voice was grim. "Fever of thirty-nine point five. Severe malnutrition. Your wolf spirit has already taken damage from multiple shifts without adequate fuel. How did you let yourself get this bad before coming in?" I clutched the two hundred. Kept my head down. Said nothing. She prescribed three days of moon elixir and a pile of medication. Total came to five hundred and eighty something. I told her all I had was two hundred. She sighed. "I'll give you one day's worth of elixir and the emergency meds. Try to scrape together the rest and finish the full course. Don't put this off." "If you wait any longer, your wolf spirit is going to be in serious trouble." I nodded. Thanked her. When I walked out of the clinic, it was already dark. Passing the dining hall, the smell of hot food hit me so hard my stomach screamed. That's when I realized I hadn't eaten anything in three full days. I stood at the entrance of the dining hall. Only one thought left in my head. If I don't eat something soon, I might actually die. I looked inside. It was peak dinner hour. Wolves coming and going. Staff dumping leftover food straight into the trash bins. Looking at what was piled inside, I hesitated for a few seconds. Then I walked over, found a piece of black bread in the corner, and started eating. I was too hungry. The moment everyone saw me eating scraps out of the garbage, the entire dining hall erupted. Every head turned. "Oh my God, who is that? Is she eating someone's leftovers?" "That's Elsa from our class. I heard her family's dead broke. Two hundred a month for living expenses. Can't even afford decent suppressant. Pretty sad." "Wait, people are still this poor?" "What's wrong with her forehead? That looks nasty..." More and more people gathered. Some pulled out their phones to film. Some pointed and whispered. All those words. All that disgust. I heard every bit of it. But I didn't have time to care. I crouched in the corner like a starving dog, thinking about nothing except filling my stomach. A few seconds later, the sound of an engine rumbled from outside the dining hall. Then gasps. "Holy crap, is that a Cullinan?" "Whose parents just showed up?" I was busy tearing into leftover bread. I didn't have the bandwidth for any of it. Then a pair of high heels stopped right in front of me. I slowly looked up. And saw my mother's face. Shaking with rage. Chapter 4 Then the haute couture outfit. The custom RM watch on her wrist. And me, looking like a beggar. Nobody in their right mind would think we were related. I stared at her for a few seconds, making sure I wasn't dreaming, then scrambled to my feet. "Mom?" "What, what are you doing here?" That one word made the entire courtyard go silent. Nobody expected the woman driving a Cullinan to be the mother of the school's most notorious poor kid. My mom didn't speak. She just looked at me, head to toe, without saying a word. My hair was a mess. Bread crumbs all over my mouth. Stains all over my clothes. And I was still gripping a half-eaten piece of someone else's black bread. The next second, she frowned, snatched it from my hand, and threw it in the trash. "Elsa, have you lost your mind?" "I give you a living allowance. You're out here eating other people's leftovers? Are you trying to make people think your own mother is abusing you?" My mom was angry. But did I want this? If I had any money at all, would I be eating out of the garbage like a dog, getting filmed and talked about? I was about to speak when Ms. Laura came rushing over, leaned in close, and whispered. "Don't talk back. Your mom cares about appearances. Seeing you like this embarrasses her. She's gonna be upset." "But she's still your mom. Don't humiliate her in public." I looked at Ms. Laura. In the end, I stayed quiet. After shushing me, Ms. Laura immediately turned to my mom. "Mona, Elsa just didn't want to waste food. Her heart's in the right place. Don't be too hard on her." My mom's face softened a fraction, but her voice was still hard. "Being thrifty is one thing, but eating other people's scraps? People are gonna think I went bankrupt." Ms. Laura smiled and nodded. "You're right. Elsa was being a bit immature. She's still young. Doesn't know better. I'll keep an eye on her from now on." Then she looked confused. "Aren't you super busy with work? How come you suddenly showed up at school?" My mom glanced at me, a little helpless. "She said she was sick. I couldn't stop worrying, so I pushed everything off my schedule and drove out here. Took me hours." Hearing that, something trembled in my chest. My mom pushed off all her work and drove hours to come see me? But I didn't understand. If she really cared that much, why would she let me live like this? Ms. Laura immediately grabbed my mom's arm. "You must be starving after that drive. Come on, let me take you to a restaurant near school. It's been forever since we had a proper girls' catch-up." "No need for all that." My mom turned her down quietly, then looked at me. "Go swipe your meal card and bring me a lunch tray. I want to taste this cafeteria food that's apparently so good you'd rather eat out of a trash can than buy a proper meal." I looked at her. Lowered my head. "I don't have any money." My mom snapped. "Elsa, are you kidding me right now?" "I transfer twenty thousand to Laura every month for your living expenses! I send you the best suppressants and nutrition supplements straight from the lab! It's only been a few days into the month and you keep telling me you have no money? Where did it all go?!" The entire dining hall went silent. I stared at her, eyes wide. "What twenty thousand? What suppressants? What supplements?" "My living allowance is two hundred a month. And I've never received any..."