I Quit the Love Game

Sadie White abandoned me for the 99th time on my birthday to find her old crush, who was threatening suicide. I told the System that this was the last straw. I was done trying to win her heart. I had spent 12 years giving it everything I had, hoping to win her over and bring some light into her world, yet it had all been for nothing. The System told me that if I died here, I could return to my original world. The first time, I tried to slit my wrist. Sadie kicked down the door and rushed me to the hospital, then angrily accused me of trying to manipulate her emotionally and get her attention. The second time, I overdosed on sleeping pills. She broke into my room just in time, wrapped her arms tightly around me, and told me she was sorry. Well, there was always gonna be next time. Chapter 1 It was a rare occasion for Sadie to find time to spend with me, and the fact that it was my birthday made it even more special. Just as I was about to cut the cake, her phone rang. She smiled at me. "I'm just gonna take this real quick," she said sweetly. I nodded. "Hello?" Casey Bankman's tearful voice shrieked through the phone. "It's my brother! He's about to jump! He says he wants to see you, and only you! No one else can get near him!" A burst of ear-splitting chaos drowned her out before Kermit Bankman's hysterical shouting came through. "Sadie, are you with Flynn right now? Are you abandoning me? You don't want me anymore, do you?!" His voice rose to a shriek. "I knew it! I knew that bastard was trying to take you away from me!" Sadie turned pale. "No! Calm down, Kermit! I'm... I'm on m—" I quickly caught her wrist. "Sadie, the Bankmans have therapists on call 24/7. They have state-of-the-art security..." Kermit suddenly screamed, and the sound of shattering glass cut through the call. "What right does he have to steal you away from me?! Today is supposed to be the 15th anniversary of the day we met!" he bellowed. "Don't tell me that asshole is stopping you from saving my brother!" Casey cried. "He's about to die, and that selfish man..." Sadie frowned. "Let go of me right now, Flynn. Kermit's in danger. This is not the time." Her expression softened slightly. "Listen. I'll be back soon." She reached out to caress my face, but I pulled away. "You have to come here right now, Sadie! He's... He's already standing on the ledge! He says he's gonna... If you don't come soon, h-he's gonna..." Sadie's eyes reddened. "Let's set this aside for now, Flynn. Kermit's more important right now. If anything happens to him... I don't think I'd be able to live with the guilt." She sighed and rubbed her temple. "I promise I'll make more time for you next time." I sneered. "That's what you said last time. And the time before that." "I mean it this time." She grabbed my shoulders, but her gaze had already drifted toward the door. "Once Kermit finally stabilizes, we can get out of here. We can go to a beautiful tropical beach..." "Flynn, you shameless piece of shit! Why are you doing this when my brother's in crisis?!" Casey shrieked. A coughing fit followed. "Sadie... My head... It hurts..." "Kermit! Listen to me! Hang on!" Sadie shouted into the phone as her composure finally crumbled. "He cut his wrists! There's blood everywhere!" Casey screamed. "Help me... Sadie... Where are you?" Kermit's weakening voice finally came through. Sadie took a deep breath. "Stay here. I'll be back when this is over!" The door slammed shut behind her. Only I heard my quiet reply. "Don't even bother coming back." The only response was the ding of the elevator as it descended toward the lobby. I glanced at the mess on the table. "System Bot or whatever, you there? I give up." Sadie used to feel guilty about breaking her promises when she stood me up. She used to come running back to me at midnight just to apologize. Now, she didn't even care enough to pretend. Chapter 2 Ever since Kermit returned from abroad, he'd been appearing in Sadie's life more and more often. I felt as though Sadie was slipping through my fingers, and I started arguing with her. I grew increasingly neurotic. Kermit kept goading me. I was already deeply depressed, yet he never stopped provoking me. He sent me pictures of the two of them sleeping in the same bed and flaunted the diamond ring she had given him. He even called me during one of my worst episodes. "Your wife spent the night with me last night. She said you can't even compare to my little toe." His words felt like a poisoned knife plunged into my chest. I told Sadie about my depression, but she thought I was just throwing a tantrum. When I broke down and smashed things, she said I was emotionally unstable. When I couldn't sleep because of it, she said I was overthinking everything. I grabbed a razor blade and slashed my wrist. I could barely tell whether I was still alive. I lay in the bathtub as my blood slowly tinged the warm water around me a faint red. My phone was still on, and Kermit's last voice message played through the speaker. "Sadie said no one would care if a guy like you died. You know that?" His laughter sounded like a dull knife sawing through my nerves. In my stupor, the water stain on the ceiling seemed to form a face that smiled mockingly down at me. The cut was deeper than I had thought. Blood kept pouring from the wound. Strangely enough, it didn't hurt. More than anything, I felt liberated. My phone vibrated again. I raised my head with difficulty and saw a photo of Kermit with his arm wrapped around Sadie's waist as he whispered something in her ear. The caption read: [She wouldn't even spare you a glance if you died right now.] My fingers trembled, and the knife slipped from the edge of the bathtub. It hit the floor with a clang. The housekeeper heard the noise, looked inside, and immediately ran out. The world began to darken. Then I heard someone breaking down the door. Sadie had brought someone to kick it open. Her eyes widened when she saw the pool of blood and the stream still flowing from my wrist. Her knees slammed against the tiles, but she didn't seem to notice. Her trembling fingers closed around my wrist as if she could somehow force the blood back inside. "Wake up! Flynn, look at me!" she shouted hoarsely. "Call an ambulance! Now!" She wrapped her arms around me as though I were the most precious thing in the world. In the ambulance, she held my hand tightly. Even when the doctor tried to examine my injury, she refused to let go. "Stay with me, Flynn. Please... I'm begging you... I can't live without you..." Chapter 3 Sadie sat beside the bed, absently running a finger over the cover of my medical record. "Why do you always have to take everything to extremes?" she muttered flatly. "Are you trying to hurt yourself just to get attention?" She frowned at me with the disapproval of a mother scolding a misbehaving child. "Kermit's situation is very different from yours, Flynn. After he lost his memory, I was all he had left." She continued wearily, "We grew up together. His parents were often abroad and rarely came home to see him. He was just a lonely child who needed a family, and I became that family." She paused, her gaze lingering on the gauze wrapped around my wrist. "He doesn't remember anyone but me. It's been that way since his accident..." She ran her fingers along my IV tube, then turned to stare out the window. "His therapist said a lot of his behavior stems from extreme insecurity." She frowned at me again, exhaustion etched across her face. "It's not what you think," she urged. "He's like a little brother to me. You already know that, don't you? You know he's sick. So why are you trying to fight with someone like that?" She sighed. "Please don't do something like this again, okay? I'm your wife, and I always will be." She lightly touched the ends of my hair, then quickly withdrew her hand. "I'll make it up to you once Kermit recovers. We'll finally take that honeymoon trip we missed, okay?" I noticed the tips of her ears turning red. That only happened when she lied. "So please..." She lowered her voice. "Could you please try to understand me this once?" I stared blankly at the ceiling. "He really needs me right now. Just for a little while, okay?" Her words sounded distant and unreal, as though they came from somewhere far away. They were too hazy to feel real, yet somehow they still forced their way into my mind. "Mm," I replied, my voice so dry that it didn't sound like my own. My depression had grown so severe that I no longer had the strength to feel angry. She said so much about wanting me to be patient, promising to make up for my sacrifices, asking me to be considerate of her situation. None of it mattered. Her words felt like dust, utterly inconsequential to me. I watched her glance at her phone again and again. I watched her repeatedly glance at her phone and unconsciously edge toward the door. Suddenly, I realized how foolish I had been. For more than three years, I had believed her empty promises. "You can go now," I said, surprised by how calm my voice sounded. The relief on Sadie's face hurt. I hadn't even known my numb heart was still capable of feeling pain. She stepped closer and reached out to ruffle my hair, but I tilted my head away from her hand. "Hey!" She froze, then gave me a helpless smile. "Oh, stop sulking. I'll be back soon." I watched her leave. As soon as she answered her phone, her voice softened into a tenderness she hadn't shown me. That was when I realized my heart was already dead. How could it not be? Every time Sadie chose him over me, she drove the knife deeper. Every time Kermit bragged about it, he twisted the blade. And I had poisoned the wounds myself with the foolish hope that someday, she would come back to me. Sadie closed the door softly behind her. It felt like the world's quietest shutter had come down, sealing me away from her. I closed my eyes and let the darkness swallow me.